noah's ark

Last week and me. Actually, who cares. It rained today; really rained. Not that lousy drizzle that's been teasing my for weeks during random days, but the hardcore, intense "your hung out clothes just got rained into the mud and your house is now floating on the rivers that were once streets." Or something like that. It was no biblical flood, but it was sexy. As sexy as falling water can be, which isn't really that much, unless you're into that kind of thing. If you are, you're a little strange. Get help.

Hopefully it continues so I can stand on a rooftop and shout false prophecies to the masses of bewildered people. Apparently there's a cyclone brewing, which means a first in years. Now, cyclones I don't mind. What pisses me off is how the power always goes out, and usually after the main event is over. It is the single most annoying thing ever. Besides peppercorn hidden in food. And some other things...

No power means no aircon. No aircon means no cooling. No cooling means a freakin' hot, stuffy night because, naturally, fans don't work either. So, it leaves me to run outside and sleep in the cool rain to catch some kind of fatal condition that ends up being cured because an angel was watching over me. Riiiiight.

Really, I love the rain and I love cyclones. But I hate no power. I want to walk around in a loin cloth and say "Yeah, I'm from the future. There's no power." when it happens. Why? Because I can.

Alright, now about last week. It was lame. No rain. Here's a list of things I did:

- Party that sucked
- Sucky party
- Stuff

And I drove around with some mates to get food because the driver was losing his license in court the next day, which is kind of funny considering he's going overseas for 6 months in a week. I wonder if people in London are as excited about rain as I am...

On another topic, this week has been pretty damn good. I'm not going to explain why, because that would mean thinking about the various reasons, when really there's only one or two. So, suffer the ambiguous paragraph while I yawn.

Useless fact #16475: Before this post, I had 2 others that really did suck and had to be put down. I was mostly talking about how funny it is when people try and talk over really loud music. Generally the receiver nods and makes the excited face.

Hint #1415: A party does not equal loud music and alcohol existing together in a space the size of an average bedroom. Learn to spread out.

Here's the weather forecast:

Sometimes... it will rain. Goodmorrowing!

- Pary ζ.

clock-blocked

This is, like, the first time I've, like, posted with checking when the last post was. Like, it doesn't feel any different but, like, it is. Because I like to liken things to likely events of likelihood. Ok, so like, I'm gonna stop saying that word that begins with "ell" and ends in tears.

Alright, lets move on to the real part of this text-adventure. No no, not that type of text adventure. Back ye basement geeks! Thar be naught but insanity in these parts. Where was I? Or more importantly, where wasn't I? Oh! I wasn't on a boat checking out a possible new career, that's for sure. I am serious. I went to bed at aboot 2am last mornight. I had to be awake at aboot 6:30am, so I could be at the wharf by 7:30. Of course I ended up 15 minutes late, courtesy of my extensive face-shaving and one-quarter-awake shower. Good times.

Anywayzzzzz, I congress... or digress. Whatever. From there I packed my posessions into a small Nike(TM) bag and was off like a squid in the sun. It was raining. On the way I thought about believable excuses for being late that didn't involve parents, animals or strangely coloured fruit. I decided to go with "I was born late and am forever doomed to defy the time-keeping tools of man."
I also decided to put my socks on at a red light, which didn't turn out so well after I stalled the car.

Naturally, or unnaturally, I ended up at "the place" where I used my observation skills to discover "E" wharf. Of course it was far down the opposite end, because apparently the alphabet goes EDCBA (Try and pronounce it as a word... Heh.) from right to left. My next challenge was to find a boat called "Ecstasea." Turns out, it was humble little yacht and nobody was there. So, I had 4 hours sleep (actually less, because I swear I saw every hour on the clock), drove in the rain, stalled the car, walked in the rain, all to see a boat that was really. Quite. Devoid of human activity. Kick arse.

The moral of this story: When it comes to anything boat related and it's raining, assume the skipper is getting drunk in some sleazy bar. Less disappointment. Also, no putting socks on at a red light. Or stockings. Although if you try it (and are female) do not hesitate to send a video tape into pervert@probablyinjail.com

Now, all day and night I have had an insatiable hunger for, uh, food. Wait, that's not really worthy of being put in, because it's an afterthough. I could go back and delete it now, followed by this and the last, but... I... just... can't... do it. And in other news, I got a haircut. So I look neat and tidy.

"You're an artist and I am your masterpiece!" I said to the hairdresser, who wasn't busty or super hot, much to my disappointment, even though I knew who was cutting my hair. Hm. Maybe I should have joined the lady passed out on the table out the front of the shop next door. I'm sure she had alot to say.

And so, it is 12:38am, I am too tired to even feel tired and I'm not sure anything I say/type makes any sense. Well it does, but I'm still not sure. I think. Holy shit, there goes a llama!

Ciao now and take a bow. Ok, that was so lame I'm going to cry and laugh at myself crying.