gossiolitics

Politics and celebrity gossip. Celebrity gossip and politics. The two subjects I love to make fun of, or mocketh in conversations that relateth to it.

As I drove around today (and every day leading up to tomorrow, the election) and noticed the abundance of candidate posters - spam - I came to realise that celebrity gossip is a bit too much like high school gossip: Somebody is pregnant; somebody else is in love with somebody's ex; someone is on drugs (again); somebody might be pregnant with somebody who is on drugs; somebody is in a scandal with sex and/or drugs; divorce this, marriage that - well, here it would simply be girlfriend/boyfriend in a high school society I suppose.

This disturbs me. People actually follow this kind of news religiously as if it's not weird. Imagine the same kind of observations and interest in, say, your neighbor's lives. It's not much different, save for the high school intelligence of these celebrities running around marrying and divorcing everyone from the opposite sex - everyone, that is, who is also a celebrity - and getting pregnant or not being able to or having an affair or just... doing normal flawed human things. To be fair though, your neighbor's lives aren't as messed-up, unless they're a celebrity, so there's no gross fascination or reassurance that you're doing well by watching them in headlines.

"John Doe on why he divorced Mary!"
"Thomas Jones caught smoking behind his shed! Why he did it: 'I, um, smoke?'"
"Kate and Tom at it again; Scientology SCAM"
"Top 10 'baby bump' spotters; Exclusive - these people are amazingly observant (and assuming)!"

It's a little weird and it reminds me of high school. You even have the geeks and the popular people. And the drugs. And those couples that are as confused about their relationships as you would be solving a rubix cube inside a mirror-box.

It will never die. Not even when the celebrities die - that's big news. But then, maybe it's not so bad watching these actors and actresses in their little high school play; like a car wreck: you can't look away because it's just... there.

Speaking of cars, wrecks and being... there, politicians need to relax a little on the advertising campaigns. It's a little much, especially on the side of roads. And those billboards that are towed around? Seriously guys (girls too, vaguely) - too much. It's a bit like browsing the internet with popups all over the place except you can't click them away.

Some are worse than others. Or rather, one is worse than the rest: Charlie McOverkillop. Four posters every few hundred meters is a bit intense, a bit hard to digest. She can stop traffic with that face. That's not a compliment; it just hits you four times in the time it takes your eyes to flicker over them. BAM! Oh god not her!

It's not subtle; it's shock and awe. Maybe if she gets in they go away - what if they don't? What if she's like a dictatoresque politician and starts demanding the construction of statues of herself - nay, four of them - every few hundred meters?

Let's not even think about.

Vote 1: The Dance Party - we know what you really want and even if we don't you can't say no to the rhythm (and celebrity-approved drugs).

- G ζ.

authorisedbyGregPage2007
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