she drives me crazy

Feminists and bad drivers. Two seemingly unrelated topics that have somehow come to a crossroads. And by somehow I mean I have forced them together for the sake of this post, much like how we're forced to share the roads with people who forget they are controlling moving tonnes of metal.

So, there I was cruising through the web, when - as what happens - I took a turn into Feminist Street: A forum full of angry, delusional females. I know; it sounds harmless and somehow normal, but these particular females were insanely aggressive to anything that doesn't wear a bra. Actually, they are just insanely aggressive toward anything.

Their posts are eerily well written grammar and spelling wise, though the convoluted nonsense to be read negates any impression of intelligence. Oh sure, they appear smart with large words and bitter cynicism, but really the lack of common sense pollutes every word. It's almost a cult following, this forum: They refer to society ("ruled by men and designed to degrade women") as the Patriarchy, or the P, for those in the know. When I say 'refer to' I mean in every fucking post. To them, everything is because of the patriarchy.

Assumptions are everywhere and the hard facts seem to ride in the backseat - no, the boot, or maybe a trailer left behind. From the thankfully brief (as amusing as it was, my head begun to hurt from the sheer stupidity) encounter I broke down the process of how the threads work:

1. Someone points out something inane and makes it appear as if it specifically targets women and proverbially demands they get back in the kitchen or so help them
2. Every reply agrees; with the word "patriarchy" thrown in like some kind of Borg movement
3. Pitchforks are handed out, as well as torches
4. The cause becomes justified and the sheer audacity of everything produces snarls and scowls
5. Hypocritical closing statements are thrown in - 'it's disgusting that there's violence and degradation to women in this inane something... I want to kill all men'

To this cult group of angry women I say: Please do not have children.

Now, the bad drivers of yonder! Where I live and drive, the most common form of bad driving stems from the following:

- Giving way, or rather, not giving way. Screw waiting for traffic, they can wait for you! Screw traffic all together: you own this road.
- Indicating, or rather, not indicating. Keep people guessing right? Look out, you're moving your tonnes of metal this way. Ha! I didn't expect that!
- Speeding. Because heaven help you get to the red light behind someone.
- Driving slow. Yes, it is bad on this end too. Look, your caution is the right idea, but there is a speed limit 50 other cars want to get to. Congestions equal frustration equals chaos.
- Car Parks. What lines? Review mirror? I like going backwards while not looking. Do it all the time without my car!

The easiest way to be a good driver is to remember this: Don't drive your car in ways that you wouldn't walk.
What I mean is, you don't run from shop to shop or weave between people in a building at speed. You don't walk in front of traffic knowing that you are going slower and it will catch up...
You don't cut in front of a car.
You don't walk backwards without looking and if there's a line, you adhere to it.

Also: Pay attention while driving! Tell your passengers you are not involved in their antics because you have a large moving object to control. Don't answer your phone! STOP THINKING YOUR CAR IS MAGIC AND WON'T BECOME A DEADLY WEAPON IF YOU DON'T USE IT PROPERLY.

Rant: Over.

- G

no little poem today
just these words to let you know
oh shit, I've done it anyway
okay, it's time to go!